30 May 2013

Today is my 150th post. I'm quite sure I have never done anything for 150 consecutive days in a row before other than brush my teeth.

On one hand, I can’t believe that I have already written 150 posts. On the other hand, quite frankly, I can’t believe I still have 215 posts to go in my year of giving daily.... How could I have already written so much and not even be halfway done? 

Some thoughts on 150:

*Writing the blog feels sacred to me: it has become a form of meditation, a prayer that I put out into the universe that something that is wrong can be righted, a belief that justice can prevail, and that some creature’s (two-legged or four-legged) suffering will be alleviated. I don’t mean to suggest that my words are so powerful because they aren’t. What I mean is I feel very strongly in the intention of what I’m doing and that even if the $10 doesn’t make a difference, the thought behind it does... I hope. My daily time with my blog is time that I am in service of others and whatever I may be going through takes a back seat to how I can help others. That has become very important to me.

*One of my original intents was to change my relationship with money and that has happened. If anything, I’m getting a little too freewheeling in my spending and I’m trying to rein myself back in a little, but I no longer worry if I’m paying more than my share when I’m splitting a bill with someone and I’m quicker to pick up a check or treat someone to a movie.  Plus, every time I’ve started to get nervous about my bank account, something reminds me to relax and realize that I am OK. I have enough for today. I have enough for today. I have enough for today.

*The discipline of having to file every single day has been good for me. As a writer, my job is an endless stream of deadlines, so I didn’t expect that part to challenge me, but it has. I’ve found myself rushing through dinners or running out of movies as soon as they’re over to get home to file because I didn’t have time to write the post during the day. If I know for sure I’m not going to be home by midnight, I make sure I file before I go out but I have definitely been caught scrambling some nights.
*Before I started this project, I had no idea that the blog posts would be anything more than a paragraph about the chosen charity, but very early on the posts became something much more... a cross between a journal entry and an editorial, a way to share my thoughts with you. Though you wouldn’t know if from reading some of the posts, I’m an extremely private person, so my desire to open up my life this way has completely taken me by surprise and it’s something I’m still trying to figure out. I have definitely written a few things that I feel odd about sharing in hindsight, but I’ve tried not to be too precious about it. A downside to that is I feel like I'm cheating if I just namecheck the charity and move on.

*There is so much good out in the world. It’s so easy to forget that, but this blog is a daily reminder. There have been times when I’ve written the blog with such a heavy heart because of the subject matter. I have felt the weight of the world and great despair as I type. But then I always try to remember that there is a charity or non-profit that is fighting for the right side of this issue every day. They are in the trenches, going to battle to make it better, even if the mighty struggle is uphill.

*There’s going to a very slight change going forward. My work and travel schedule continue to be demanding, so I’ve asked a few friends, people who have been tremendously supportive of my effort here, to write a blog post for me. I’ve already gotten a handful and I quickly realized that I have friends who are beautiful writers, but also that they have picked great charities that I would have never found. So very occasionally, I’m going to post a blog written by one of them. I’ll always identify it as such and I will still be the one making the daily donation, since the whole point of this year is for me to give money away every day. The first one will get dropped in next week. Again, they aren’t going to be that frequent, but it will help me tremendously on some days to be able to just plug in someone else’s words. Also, it became clear very early on that this felt like a group project. I have gotten so much positive feedback from people reading that it feels right to spread it around a little.

Here’s to the next 215... and, as always, thank you for reading. 

Why I started this blog

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150 down, 215 to go

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