Tonight I went to a small listening party for Elton John’s new album, “Diving Board.” It’s a beautiful, sumptuous album that really highlights Elton’s magnificent piano playing. 

I don’t really remember a time in my life when Elton’s music wasn’t a part of it and he’s still one of my favorite artists. They say it’s a bad idea to meet your childhood idols and, to be sure, I’ve been disappointed in a few that I’ve met, but Elton would not be one of them. I first met him eight years ago when I interviewed him for a Billboard story and we hit it off. 

I’m not in his inner circle by any means, but when we see each other, it’s always warm and wonderful. When I got laid off from Billboard, Elton was one of the first people to call me and tell me it would be alright. That’s how kind he is. He didn’t have to do that, but he knew it meant the world to me. I told my mom that Elton had called to say everything would be fine and that’s when I think she breathed a deep sign of relief and thought if Elton had said it, it most be true. And it was. 

I’ve visited him in the studio for the last two albums and interviewed him numerous times now. He’s as friendly, funny, and gracious as can be, but there’s no getting around the butterflies when I realize I’m talking to Sir frigging Elton frigging John. I still, nearly 10 years later, can’t get over the fact that he knows my name. Sir frigging Elton frigging John....

Tonight, after producer T Bone Burnett led a playback of five songs from the album, Elton came out and played three songs live, which was as great as you’d think it would be. 

Then, he admitted that he had butterflies. He said he was a “nervous wreck” to play the new material for us. It was an endearing moment. He seemed to delight in the fact that after all these decades of being a superstar, he still got a little nervous when it came to debuting the new stuff. Maybe, then, it’s just fine that I still get butterflies when I talk to him and other superstars. Maybe it’s just a sign that I still am growing and loving what I do and I’m not jaded. I really still care about how I do my job. That’s how I’m going to look at it from here on out.  If it’s good enough for Elton, it’s good enough for me. 

As much as Elton’s music will be his legacy, his legacy will also be his tremendous work he’s done for AIDS research. In its 20 years, The Elton John AIDS Foundation has raised more than $300 million and its goal is to create an AIDS-free future. Elton is a tireless advocate for the foundation, traversing the globe in search of a cure, speaking at AIDS conferences, speaking to anyone who will listen about this horrible disease. I’m proud to call Elton one of my heroes, even more so now than when I was growing up. 

April 11: Elton John AIDS Foundation

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Today is my 100th post! 

When I started the blog, I wondered how, if at all, it would change me. Join me for my first State of the Causes & Effect Union as we look back on the first 100 days of my blogging.

Here are five ways writing and giving money every day has changed me:

*I feel much more connected to the world. For the last several years, I’ve adopted a “we’re all in this together” stance, but I don’t know if I really felt that way until I started Causes & Effect. Almost every day, I’m writing about something that has happened on the planet that day. It can be a big global event, one person’s story, or just what has occurred in my life, but it’s all part of a bigger picture that unites all of us.

*Not only do I feel more connected to the world, I feel more connected to individuals. Whenever I’m tempted to think I’m writing in a void, someone reaches out from out of the blue to comment on a post or the blog in general. Sometimes it’s someone I knew previously, sometimes it’s someone I didn’t, but the result is the same: a humbling sense that in its own very small way, Causes & Effect is sending a little, tiny blast of optimism and good will into the universe. 

*There’s so much good out in the world. Even though my daily giving is often based on some atrocity or some injustice, every day I find an organization that is dedicated to righting some wrong or to making the world a better place. Instead of focusing on the darkness, this blog focuses on the light, and that has made me do the same.

*I’m happier. I’m very lucky in that I’ve never been prone to any kind of long-term depression, but I’ve definitely had bouts of feeling blue and of feeling very alone. But now, part of every single day is spent thinking about how to be part of the solution instead of part of the problem (as trite as that sounds) and whatever issues I may be facing that day are set aside to focus on something much, much bigger than myself. Study after study shows that philanthropy is good for one’s mental state and my own one-woman focus group has definitely borne that out.

*As I wrote in my initial post on Jan. 1, I wanted to change my relationship with money and become a little less of a cheapskate. That has definitely happened. I’m much quicker to pick up the check or to not worry if I’m paying more than my fair share at a group dinner. When I’m writing a big check, whether it’s for taxes or for a car repair or some other charitable cause above and beyond Causes & Effect, I feel no anxiety about it. I’m cherishing the sense of abundance that this project has given me. I feel taken care of, with a general sense of wellbeing. I may be spending more than I used to, but I’m trusting that if I keep working hard and putting one foot in front of the other, it will all turn out OK. 

And for the first 100 days, I can say it has all turned out far better than OK. 

Today’s $10 goes to one of the first charities I remember supporting when I started donating money decades ago: Doctors Without Borders. Like firefighters rushing into a burning building, the doctors and nurses of Doctors Without Borders risk their lives going into places the rest of us would flee from. It’s always been one of my favorite organizations. 

Thank you so much for continuing on this journey with me. Occasionally there are days where it feels like a burden to have to write every day, but the vast majority of the time, it feels like a blessing...and part of the blessing is knowing that I’m not doing this alone. Thank you for that. 

April 10: Doctors Without Borders

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Today is Chooseday Tuesday. It’s morphed a little from when I first started this blog on Jan. 1.

In most cases, it still means that every Tuesday I give money to a charity that a reader has suggested in that reader’s name (if I can...occasionally, the donation form doesn’t allow it). Sometimes, I have something I want to write about that a friend has inspired me to and then, even if the friend hasn’t suggested I give to a specific charity, I pick one close to his or her heart.  I love when people suggest charities to me. I still have a good list to go through, but it reinforces the feeling that even though I’m doing the writing and the giving, we’re on this journey together. Furthermore, they realize that even $10 can make a difference because it can. 

Last week, one of my closest friends, Lynn,  asked me to write about www.adamspector.org, it’s a charity set up to honor her second cousin, who passed away from cancer at the age of 25 in 2007. 

I wasn’t fortunate to meet Adam, but I remember he came to Los Angeles toward the end of his life, and Lynn, Adam's mom, and Adam enjoyed their time in the sunshine, even as he received treatment at City of Hope. His  3 1/2-year battle was a painful one, full of fits and starts, encouragement and then disappointment, and lots of different attempts to battle back the disease.  The recent Wharton Business School grad's life seemed full of promise when he was diagnosed: he was working at JP Morgan as an analyst

When he knew that his time was at hand, he asked that his family set up a fund, the Adam R. Spector Foundation, at Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center in hopes that other Hodgkins patients wouldn’t have to go through so many of the debilitating treatments that he did only to have their pain end in frustration... or worse. 

I’m always humbled and awed by people who are able to turn their tragedy into something that will help others and that’s what Adam’s family has done. A visit to the Foundation's website brings him back to life.

On April 13, the fifth annual Adam Spector Walk To Win will be held in Rosemont, Pa. As in past years, the two-mile walk will be held at Harriton High School , where Adam was class valedictorian in 1999. The event will be hosted by Brian Taff from 6ABC and it looks like it has become quite the local event.

The Adam R. Spector Foundation has provided funding for research studies at Memorial Sloan-Kettering, as well as Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia, and Texas Children’s Hospital. 

In addition to the annual race, the Foundation has held other fundraising efforts, including wine tastings. Since it was established a few years ago, the Adam R. Spector Foundation has raised more than $400,000 for Hodgkins cancer research. 

Today’s $10 goes to The Adam R. Spector Foundation, in my friend Lynn’s name. She’ll be back in Pennsylvania this weekend walking to honor her cousin and helping raise money in hopes that eventually, a cure will be found and no one will have to walk anymore. 

April 9: The Adam R. Spector Foundation

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Over the last 48 hours,  Margaret Thatcher, Annette Funicello, and Lilly Pulitzer, all passed. About the only traits they share is that they were all successful women who forged their way in a man’s world. 

While I’m not about to try to defend Thatcher’s politics because I disagreed with much of what she did, I did admire how she maneuvered her way through a roomful of men, some of whom probably wanted her to bring them coffee much more than they wanted to hear her dictate policy. She must have felt very alone a lot of the time.

We’ve come a long way, baby, but I’m still stunned by how far women are in power positions. Just to put it into perspective, in 2011, there were only 12 female CEOs among the Fortune 500. TWELVE. How is it even statistically possible for the number to be so low?  That’s a lot of un-utilized brain power. 

A 2010 Time magazine article states that women earn 77 cents for every $1 a man earns (and I doubt that’s changed in the last few years).  That was for Caucasians. The disparity was even greater for African American women: 68 cents, and for Latinas: 58 cents.) 

The poverty gap between men and women is greater in America than anywhere else in the Western world, according to Center for American Progress. 

While I celebrate the accomplishments of women like Thatcher, Pulitzer and Funicello, we’ve got a long, long way to go. 

Today's $10 goes to the National Organization for Women. I first joined them when I was a teenager, but haven't given to them in a very long time. Time to start again.

April 8: National Organization for Women

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I’m in Las Vegas covering the Academy of Country Music Awards. There are about 15 things going on at once, so this one is going to be short.

Just as The Recording Academy (the folks who present the Grammys) has its charitable arm, so do the ACMs. In its rather broad mission statement, Lifting Lives is dedicated to “improving lives through the power of music.” That allows them lots of leeway, but for much of their giving, they partner with other non-profits, including Make-A-Wish. Often a performer appears on the ACMs in a Lifting Lives segment with proceeds going to a charity they endorse. Tonight it’s Jewel for ChildHungerEndsHere.com. In they past, they pacted with Carrie Underwood to provide relieve to flood victims after the Nashville flood and with Trace Adkins for Wounded Warriors, whom I gave to a few days ago. 

April 7: Lifting Lives

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There’s big doings at the continuing care facility where my elderly father lives. 

Matilda, a lovely Canada goose, has returned. Everyone believes she's the same goose as last year because she’s built her nest in the exact same spot: underneath an awning outside a long hallway that connects two wings. She must like the attention because she plunked herself right below one of the few windows where residents can peer down and see her, but she’s just out of reach of anyone who goes on the patio and who might try to get too close.  Though I haven’t seen him, her mate, who my father has named Matt, is proudly hovering nearby for the 28-day gestational period. 

Unlike the pigeons who have taken up residence at my apartment, Matilda is one smart mom. She picked a location that offers shelter from the rain and other elements, and she’s inches from a man-made cascading pond that makes for a most excellent swimming hole and water source. She’s also surrounded by grass and everything else she could possibly need all within eye-and earshot of her feathered nest. (She also seems to have dragged a styrofoam cup over. No one is quite sure of its purpose). 

In a facility where death is the only permanent resident, the joy over new life cannot be overstated, especially of the fluffy, chirping, gosling variety. Everyone —residents and staffers— seems to stop to look out the window to check out their girl. Even those in wheelchairs often pull themselves up to a semi-standing position to get a glimpse of her since she’s tucked so closely to the building that you have to press your head right against the glass to look down to see her. She’s a main topic of conversation and she brings a smile to everyone's face.

Last year, shortly after the goslings were born, Matilda and Matt taught them to swim in the pond and then left to explore the area or migrate or do whatever they do. There were a few additional sightings, but no guarantee that they’d come back to roost when it came time to hatch some new siblings. 

Though my father lives in a wonderful place where he is very well taken care of and every effort is made to focus on life, there’s no escaping death. It sits beside the residents—sometimes patiently, sometimes not—biding its time. Even residents who first come in to the independent living section seem to know this will be their last stop. When someone dies, the facility always puts up a framed notice in the exact same gold and cream paper with the person’s name and birth and death dates written in beautiful calligraphy. Beside the frame, in a glass vase, is a red rose. On good days, there are no notices, on bad days there’s more than one. 

Matilda is a beautiful reminder that even in the shadow of death, new life springs forth as sure as the tulips and daffodils push through the earth. Spring and renewal are here.

Today’s $10 goes to Ducks Unlimited,a non-profit that focuses on wetlands and waterfowl conservation. I wish there were a Geese Unlimited, but I couldn’t find one. Maybe Matilda and I will start it. 

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Following Roger Ebert’s passing yesterday, I’ve been reading some of his old movie reviews that people have posted. 

What struck me is that he was an absolute scholar in terms of his movie knowledge, but he wrote like he was just one of us: someone who had paid for his ticket (though he didn’t) and sometimes wanted to be entertained and, at other times, informed, but always moved.

The reviews many people have gravitated toward as they look back over his life are for the movies he hated and, I have to admit, there’s a certain joy in reading just how exercised he got over films that fell so far short of his expectations. The one that seems to evoke the most ire is “North,” of which he wrote: “I hated this movie. Hated hated hated hated hated this movie. Hated it. Hated every simpering stupid vacant audience-insulting moment of it. Hated the sensibility that thought anyone would like it. Hated the implied insult to the audience by its belief that anyone would be entertained by it,” he wrote in the Chicago Sun-Times.  How do we think he really felt? 

But when he loved something, his passion was equally spine-tingling because he knew a great movie was something much more than just celluloid. It was magic with the power to change the world or the ability to say something new about the human condition.  Of basketball film, “Hoop Dreams,” he wrote, “A film like ‘Hoop Dreams’ is what the movies are for. It takes us, shakes us, and makes us think in new ways about the world around us.”  Spike Lee’s “Do The Right Thing” was another favorite: “The film is a virtuoso act of creation, a movie at once realistic and symbolic, lighthearted and tragic, funny, and savage.” 

People respected him for his reviews, but they fell in love with him after he was diagnosed with cancer. Disfigured from the surgery and unable to speak or eat, he carried on with a seemingly indomitable spirit and with a dignity, humor and grace that most of us can only wish we possessed.  

Following Ebert’s death yesterday, Salon reprinted an essay the website ran in 2011 from his book, “Life Itself: A Memoir.” He wrote about his own death with the same beautiful simplicity and unsentimental poignancy that he wrote about movies. 

This paragraph about kindness stuck with me: “ ‘Kindness’ covers all of my political beliefs. No need to spell them out. I believe that if, at the end, according to our abilities, we have done something to make others a little happier, and something to make ourselves a little happier, that is about the best we can do. To make others less happy is a crime. To make ourselves unhappy is where all crime starts. We must try to contribute joy to the world. That is true no matter what our problems, our health, our circumstances. We must try. I didn’t always know this and am happy I lived long enough to find it out.”

How fortunate, as he states, that Ebert “lived long enough to figure it out.” May we all be so lucky.

April 5: American Cancer Society

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Today marks the 45th anniversary of Martin Luther King Jr.’s death. As the years since his death roll by, his words seem only more appropriate (and the quote about health care sounds like he could have made it today). 

Here are my 10 favorite MLK Jr. quotes: 

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”

“Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase.”

“If you can't fly then run, if you can't run then walk, if you can't walk then crawl, but whatever you do you have to keep moving forward.” 

“Change does not roll in on the wheels of inevitability, but comes through continuous struggle. And so we must straighten our backs and work for our freedom. A man can't ride you unless your back is bent.”

“An individual has not started living until he can rise above the narrow confines of his individualistic concerns to the broader concerns of all humanity.”

“Never, never be afraid to do what's right, especially if the well-being of a person or animal is at stake. Society's punishments are small compared to the wounds we inflict on our soul when we look the other way.” 

“Only in the darkness can you see the stars.” 

“Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.” 

“Of all the forms of inequality, injustice in health care is the most shocking and inhumane.” 

“The arc of the moral universe Is long, but it bends toward justice.”

I already gave to The King Center on Jan. 21, Martin Luther King Jr. Day, and since I can’t repeat charities, today’s $10 goes to an organization that pre-dates King, but certainly shares a similar purpose and mission: The NAACP, the National  Advancement for the Assn. of Colored People. Founded in 1909, it is the oldest civil rights organization in the U.S. 

April 4: NAACP

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P.S.: Sorry about the wacky white and black type. For some reason I can't fix it. Will endeavor to have it fixed by the time I post tomorrow. Thanks!

I’m in my hometown in North Carolina visiting family. I love North Carolina and am so proud to be from here, but I swear every time I come back there’s some news that makes me think the Tar Heel state has gone plum crazy. 

Today it was the news that two state legislators want to make Christianity the official state religion. They are so eager to do so they have introduced legislation that will allow the state to be exempt from the U.S. Constitution.

It gets better: in addition to the first section, which says that the Constitution applies only on a federal level,  the second section states that the NC general assembly “does not recognize federal court rulings which prohibit and otherwise the State of North Carolina, its public schools..... from making laws respecting an establishment of religion.”

Um, wasn’t this decided more than 200 years ago?  And while Sections 1 and 2 don’t mention a specific religion, the legislators have said they want it to be Christianity. How would you feel, and what would it even mean, if you were Jewish or Buddhist or Muslim and you lived in a state where the official religion was Christianity? How does that work for you? Are you no longer allowed to practice your religion? 

It is truly terrifying to think about the ramifications of this bill if you have any respect or love for the Constitution. 

As several commentators have pointed out, it’s interesting that these same folks who are so determined to make sure that the 2nd Amendment is upheld (according to their own very broad definition) are so willing to do away with that pesky Establishment Clause in the 1st Amendment that, in part, prohibits the U.S. government from naming a national religion. I guess in N.C. we get to decide which parts of the Bill of Rights we want to uphold.

I would say the bill has no chance of passing, but in recent weeks we’ve seen absolutely batshit crazy laws pass in other Southern states, so who knows. All I know is if it does pass, it won’t stand a chance of being upheld once it’s challenged by the ACLU or whoever decides to take it on (the bill was introduced in part in response to an ACLU suit against NC’s Rowan County over the board of commissioners opening its meeting with Christian prayers).  

North Carolina is known for a great many wonderful things: barbeque, the Durham Bulls, the Carolina Panthers, Coach K, Andy Griffith, Dean Smith, Ava Gardner, Thelonious Monk, James Taylor... does it now have to be known as the land where separation between church and state doesn’t exist? 

April 3: American Civil Liberties Union

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Today is World Autism Awareness Day. To bring awareness to autism, many landmarks, including the Empire State Building, turned blue.

According to autism advocacy group Autism Speaks, autism affects 1 in 88 children and 1 in every 54 boys. All the children I know with autism are boys, or maybe it just manifests itself in a different way in girls that I don’t recognize..

The stats are daunting, but there are so many encouraging stories of people with autism who are finding their own way, especially among my own friends who have children with autism. One of my friends has turned into a leading national advocate after his son was diagnosed and has even reached the lofty levels of the White House to educate and advocate about autism. 

The story that has touched me the most belongs to two friends of mine whose son’s autism is severe enough that he has trouble speaking and doesn’t like being touched, but he functions at a high enough level that he was able to get his GED.  Ever since Dean was very little, he loved to go to Chuck E. Cheese. The closest pizza parlor was more than 20 miles from where he lived, but his parents would frequently take him there because it made him so happy.  After he got his GED, he was looking for a job. It turned out that a Chuck E. Cheese across town  was auditioning for new Chuck E. Cheese mascots. The job entailed not speaking, wearing a very hot costume, communicating with the kids through hugs, and being able to do the Chuck E. dance (I don’t exactly know what this entails since I’ve never been to a Chuck E. Cheese). Dean’s father called the store’s manager and explained the situation about his son and asked if he could audition. The manager said sure. There were 60 applicants for three spots.  After Dean auditioned, the manager named the applicants who should stay. Dean’s name wasn’t called. Deans dad went to thank the manager anyway and she said, “Oh, your son is hired! We’ve never had anyone who already knew all the dances!” 

Dean is now a star at his local Chuck E. Cheese and his manager, an incredible loving and wonderful woman according to my friends, constantly sings his praises.  Once he puts on the costume, he’s transformed into a character who loves to hug children and communicates with absolutely no difficulty at all. His sense of pride and sense of responsibility has soared. With his very first paycheck, he took his mom out to eat...not at Chuck E. Cheese.

Dean doesn’t drive, so he takes transportation provided for him every day to work and he is thriving. His parents have gone from the horribly scary state of wondering who will take care of their beloved son when they pass on to seeing their son be able to take care of himself when they go away for the weekend. He has blossomed in ways they had so hoped for, but feared they’d never realize.

Dean’s dream is to be a character at Disneyland. I have no doubt that one day soon his parents are going to tell me that he’s the new Goofy (that’s his favorite). 

 We rush to  call it a miracle when something like this happens, but it’s really the beautiful elixir of  love, faith, belief, kindness, patience, and persistence. And since I’m rooting for Dean to become Goofy, let’s throw in a little pixie dust.

Today’s is Chooseday Tuesday, and even though they didn’t ask me, I’m making the $10 donation in Dean’s parents’ name to Autism Speaks.   

April 2: Autism Speaks

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As you may have heard over the weekend, record producer Phil Ramone died on Saturday. You may not know his name, but you definitely know some of the albums he’s produced or engineered, including Billy Joel’s “The Stranger,” Bob Dylan’s “Blood On the Tracks,” Paul Simon’s “50 Ways To Leave Your Lover,” Paul McCartney’s “Ram,” and Tony Bennett’s” Duets.” 

I didn’t know Ramone well, but the time I spent with him was always pleasant. He was a joy to interview because he so willingly shared his amazing stories from more than five decades of making music. I got to be in the studio with him when he worked with Bennett and it was a pleasure to see him in action. A classically trained musician, Ramone attended Julliard, then went on to start as an engineer before becoming a producer. His command of his craft showed in every production. 

One thing I read over and over about Ramone in many of the tributes to him was how willing, actually eager, he was to help upcoming talent. He seemed to always have time to answer someone’s questions. Many, many people considered him a mentor. 

I went to his website to see if there was a charity that he was affiliated with, and, not surprisingly, one of the ones listed was the National Mentoring Partnership. NMP’s MENTOR program links with 28 mentoring partnerships national wide and with more than 5,000 mentoring programs, according to its website. Mentor’s ambitious goal is to find mentors for all 18 million kids it says are looking for one. 

April 1: National Mentoring Partnership

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Happy Easter! I grew up in the Presbyterian Church that my mother co-founded. It was a comfortable, non-dogmatic, religious upbringing and one that centered on God’s grace and love. I never rebelled against it because there wasn’t anything that I particularly needed to rebel again. It wasn’t like I couldn’t play cards or couldn’t dance or couldn’t drink. 

As I got older, I began to question more and I also found myself moving to the Episcopalian Church and its more progressive, inclusive message.  There are all these things we can’t know that I struggle with: the usual “If God exists, how could he/she allow [throw in any atrocity here] to happen?” or the much more existential question of if I believe in Jesus, then what does it mean to truly live a godly life in his image? Why do so many conservatives cling to their notion of Christianity that is so antithetical to mine? How can we both be right? What about all the hypocrisy and violent acts that are committed in the name of God and/or Christianity? The Episcopal Church seems to let my intellectual and faith sides co-exist and one doesn’t have to trump the other.

I’ve never had trouble reconciling God and evolution or had trouble justifying all different types of religious faith. I just figured that God was big enough and omnipotent enough to speak to you in whatever language/faith you best received him/her, whether it’s Christianity, Judaism,  Islam... or none of the above: we all know secular humanists who carry out Jesus’s message far better than people who claim to be Jesus’s followers.   And, it may come back to haunt me at the Pearly Gates (if Heaven exists, and I’d like to believe it does), but I have never, ever felt compelled to try to convert someone to my way of thinking or to Christianity. That just seems disrespectful. 

Last year, I started a class offered through the University of the South’s  theology school called Education for Ministry (my fellow Episcopalians may be familiar with it). It’s the equivalent of a Masters degree in theology over four years (though we don’t have the write papers or take tests so I don’t actually get the Masters degree). I wanted to read and discuss the Bible from a primarily historical perspective and this was the closest I could find. In our first year, we’re studying the Old Testament. Well, as anyone who has really studied the Old Testament can attest, you can’t get through the Book of Genesis without stories conflicting left and right, so for me  (not that I believed in it anyway), any notion of the Bible’s literalness went out the window from the start. And, may I add, I'm convinced you only really need to read the Old Testament and the collected works of Shakespeare to learn everything you need to know about human nature and that it doesn't change... 

What I believe— and this has only increased as my religious questions have also mounted— is that what matters is that we love each other and that we be kind to each other. That’s really what it comes down to to me now: Kindness. I value it in people I meet and I desire to be kinder in my own life because I know what it feels like to be treated unkindly, I know what it feels like to feel unloved, and they are both horrible. I also know what it feels like to be treated kindly and to be treated with love and to know that kindness ought never be confused with pity. 

Everything I’ve read about Jesus, in whatever way/role you want to believe he existed, focuses on his kindness and his love for the disenfranchised. I honestly don’t know how any lesson to be learned from Jesus can be interpreted as anything other than to serve, love, and help your fellow man, especially those less fortunate than you, with compassion and kindness. ALL of your fellow men, not just the ones who think, look, or believe like you do. 

It’s easy to write that from my lofty perch here and much harder to put into practice. The church I go to now serves lunch to more than 100 homeless people every Monday and shares my thoughts about Jesus and social justice, so today’s $10 goes to my church. I’m not saying the name of it here to respect the privacy of my fellow churchgoers, but I’m so thankful to have found a place that welcomes me despite all my doubts. 

March 31: My local Episcopal church.

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The first charity I really remember having any sustained involvement with was Youth For Easter Seals. I just googled it and it looks like that division of the Easter Seals doesn’t exist anymore, though Easter Seals definitely does. 

Easter Seals provides services for people with autism and other disabilities. When I was volunteering with them, autism wasn’t as recognized as it is now, so I remember dealing primarily with kids with Down’s Syndrome. I was around 14 or so when I and some friends took a group of disabled kids to Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey circus. My friend’s older brother played chauffeur.

Looking back, I was too young to deal with the challenges that taking care of disabled kids and young adults entailed. I remember my charge needed to go to the bathroom and I was terrified that I would do something wrong. I also had no idea if the kid I was assigned to could have snacks of if I needed to regulate her sugar intake. I don’t remember getting any training, but that seems unlikely, doesn’t it? I must just not remember. Everyone survived, but I felt like it was too much responsibility and I was too scared that I would screw up. 

However, when I look back on it now, I realize there wasn’t much that could have gone wrong and while I felt burdened, I also learned early on that it’s so easy to give back. It really takes so little to make a difference in someone’s life. There’s no minimum required. Whether it’s giving to the homeless person in front of the grocery store, teaching kids to read, coaching a youth sports team or serving on a board, the one thing I’ve learned is that you can always find some charity that needs your help that will work with your schedule and you can give as little or as much as you want. The other great think I’ve realized is that any time I spent volunteering, I somehow got back in spades. 

March 30:  Easter Seals

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Cate Edwards was interviewed on “Today” this morning. Cate is the eldest daughter of John Edwards and the late Elizabeth Edwards. As I watched the interview, I was tremendously impressed with her poise and her ability to convey how she felt while giving the bare minimum of a reply, such as when Savannah Guthrie asked her about Rielle Hunter, the woman her father had the affair with.  Cate answered very politely, but her eyes were screaming “Trailer trash!!”

God knows there’s no shortage to choose from, but I don’t know if a politician ever let me down more than John Edwards. With his youthful good looks and his emphasis on social justice, he had a Kennedy-esque air about him and I loved that he represented my home state, North Carolina. He had ideas that I really agreed with and seemed almost destined to be president. And then, well, then, he fell into the honey trap. As we see politician after politician fall, I honestly do think that is the difference between men and women. We don’t see female politicians getting into these kinds of scandals. Every time it happens, I’m torn between why we care at all (since it’s someone’s private life) and anger that the man just couldn’t keep his pants zipped, especially when he has so much to lose. As usual in such cases, his lies about the affair and his paternity were way more disturbing than the actual affair.... though had I known that all it took to get a guy to fall for you was to walk up to him and say “You’re hot,” my life could have been a hell of a lot more interesting. 

I digress. While Cate had to spill about Rielle and her dad, the main point of her “Today” show appearance was to plug the Elizabeth Edwards Foundation. The mission of the EEF is to “educate, enrich, and empower” youth from low-income backgrounds through mentoring, public service, and community leadership. Today’s $10 goes to EEF. 

On a side note, I don’t know if I’ve ever been more proud of my hometown than when the cretins from  Westboro Baptist Church decided to protest at Edwards’ funeral for reasons that make no more sense than any of their other protests do. The service was at Edenton Street Methodist, a beautiful, 200-year old church in downtown Raleigh. Several hundred locals lined the streets around the church and linked arms to block the protesters and to pay their final respects for Edwards. 

March 29: Elizabeth Edwards Foundation 

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I write a lot about reading in this blog, I’ve discovered. I’ve mentioned the Bookmobile and what joy it gave my sister and me when we were growing up to be able to walk without adult supervision the few blocks from our house to where it parked and pick out our own books to read. 

It gave us such a sense of independence. We got to choose which books we wanted to read, not some librarian or other adult. I still remember the Bookmobile was a weird turquoise and it looked old and smelled funny but it was filled with magic and possibilities because there were books inside. It probably only held about 1000 books, but I loved pulling a book off the shelf and deliberating if I’d take that one home or select another one. When I think about it, I have a full sense memory of standing in the bookmobile, overwhelmed with possibilities and aglow with what I may discover next.

Tonight was my monthly book club. For the first time, everyone really, truly loved the book. I wrote about it a few weeks ago:  this month’s selection was “The Fault In Our Stars” by John Green. Since I finished it, Shailene Woodley has been cast as the lead in the film version. I’m glad I didn’t know that when I read the book because she is not at all how I imagined the lead. At. All... I think she’s a fine actress, but I was disappointed when I’d heard she got the part. Hazel needs to be played by a younger Mae Whitman-type.  See, it’s only a book, but it really matters to me how this one translates to the screen, because, even though I just wrote the first part of this sentence,  I don’t believe a great read is ever “only a book.” It’s something way more special than that. It’s a gateway to another world; to a world you have no other way of experiencing other than by turning the page. You are never alone if you have a good book with you. 

I had no idea what charity to give to today and then one of my fellow book club members suggested Centro Latino for Literary. Founded in 1991, Centro Latino addressed a critical need among the Los Angeles Latino community: the ability to read and write in their own language. Centro Latino teaches non-literate adult Spanish speakers how to read and write in Spanish, which then gives them the confidence to learn how to do so in English.  In 20 years, Centro Latino has expanded greatly to now teach Pre-ESL literacy skills, math, grammar, and job readiness skills. 

March 28: Centro Latino

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